rant

hateface_blah @ 2007-12-05T21:38:00

2007-12-06T02:40:36Z

bianca was right. arcopofuck sucks balls. Well, not really acropolis, but Tarek. I want him to suckonah. God he makes me want to punch babies, no joke. and the hours suck. akjhdakjh

hateface_blah @ 2007-12-02T07:19:00

2007-12-02T12:26:40Z

between the buried and me last night was f-ing great. Only complaint... some rigoddamndiculous fat man slinking through the crowd like a wee tot. Needless to say a 300lbs man with a rattail only successfully ended up right in front of me from much sweat and moshing directed mostly at innocent bystanders (me). whatever, I got that flame tee, hollah! Shu and g-love, good company... pizza, fries, sweet tea, august burns red and btbam... sweet.

bad news- cody's truck... wrecked. in a nutshell, somehow a car found a way to drive on the side of his truck. lame. lame. lame. and much freaking out by yours truely when I recieved the phone call. Dude flipped his car and left on a stretcher, meanwhile Cody, Freakin superman, left without a scratch. (thank god) there goes $500 in christmas presents towards his car. :\

speaking of, x-mas party in the works yo, 2 years running.
peace

hateface_blah @ 2007-11-26T17:08:00

2007-11-26T22:14:07Z

last night was epic.
whipmate, shmegs, meeks, tam, g-love, claire, eric, cliff, alex, keaton, scuba, laina and cody in one gigantic cuddle puddle. that about sums up the night. when everyone ends up on the floor, lying all over each other and listening to scooob's master mixes, lights off, and laughing about everything... yeah, you know it was a good night. CUDDLE PUDDDLLEEE! good times.

hateface_blah @ 2007-11-18T05:27:00

2007-11-18T10:33:36Z

fuuuuuuuuuuuck. Sometimes I really fucking hate serving. Tonight was the shit night, yanno, that night that EV-ER-EEEEEE-THEEEEN-GUH goes wrong. Plus it was THAT NIGHT, yanno, when you make a good $150 dollars, but something fucks up with your money and you end up leaving with $75..... I hate the stress of money and work. If only I could havmy 150acres with a little shack right in the middle, lil outdoor shower and all of that in advance... alas tis not possibllehhhhh fuck.

ON a lighter note, my favorite people in the whole wide word: Cody, Meghan, her boytoy and Sam, my manager and the owner of acrop. LOVE YOU GUYS! sam lurrrvs me! It rocks when the owner thinks you're the greatest (HELLO MONEEEEYY!)lol

hateface_blah @ 2007-11-09T16:01:00

2007-11-09T21:04:38Z

what a great day for trips to St. Pete with cody,shmegs and garrett to see Dali and eat outside in the sun at the sandwich shop next door. Bob marley, amazing art and fucking around with birds for 30 minutes... great... work for the next 12 hours... laaaameee.

hateface_blah @ 2007-11-03T01:22:00

2007-11-03T05:25:42Z

bomb ass weed, beer, mr. jones, white zin, In Living Color, beer, G-love, The Doors, Shmegs, Reggae Pink Floyd, beer, laina, journey, south park, new car, 10 yards, wayne = halloween

I'd call it a success.

hateface_blah @ 2007-10-31T08:02:00

2007-10-31T12:06:48Z

ACROP-o-HOE- grand opening (craziness)

<3-Sam

Christian is so hot lol

hateface_blah @ 2007-10-31T08:02:00

2007-10-31T12:05:29Z

ACROP-o-HOE- grand opening (craziness)

<3-Sam

Christian is so hot lol

hateface_blah @ 2007-10-30T00:01:00

2007-10-30T04:03:31Z

I love my new job. even though it kicks my ass, its so good to sorta enjoy going to work. :) P.S. Cody's mom rocks for getting him a laptop. hellz yeah its pretty sweet.

hateface_blah @ 2007-10-18T07:31:00

2007-10-18T11:34:38Z

updates.
marked up to four people that've fallen apart in the past month.
sad sad sad. who else is going to rehab, raise your hand. not me.
no way. Its crazy seeing all these people around you fuck up.
however, I must say, last night was a good night of fucking up, smoking
blunts with cody, nick, ryan and garrett.(nice pad)
my place is starting to look purrrfect

peace out homies.

hateface_blah @ 2007-10-05T01:43:00

2007-10-05T08:56:38Z

If I really had a problem and was your friend,
where where you when you saw me get bad?
If you really thought I was different,
where where you when I started to change?
If you really loved me,
why would you break my heart?
If you really where my friend,
why did you hurt me like you did?
Why did you take him that night?
and make up all of those lies?
and pretend that you cared
just as much as I did,
when you hardly cared at all?
If I am really a zombie
And you really hate him
And you really think that I'm bad...
Well where the hell have you been?
You've never tried to help
Or understand... that maybe I'm the way I am... because you killed the old me.
Maybe all of those hurtful lies
burned like acid on my heart
and left a hole that grew.
I'm not a zombie from these pills...
You and him killed me a long time ago...

And it was "my boyfriend that you dont like"
That brought me back to life,
and made me believe that I still had a heart.
Even after you tore it away.

hateface_blah @ 2007-08-24T10:33:00

2007-08-24T14:36:50Z

This is what happens when I cant sleep at night.
lol
who's who? :)

hateface_blah @ 2007-07-29T22:41:00

2007-07-30T02:42:10Z

something interesting please

hateface_blah @ 2007-07-27T08:00:00

2007-07-27T12:08:30Z

bahhh...

what a long week it has been. Cody and I both lost our job on the same day. Wonderful. That night... my friend larry hits a semi head-on, flies through the windsheild and hits the semi with his face, going 70, shattering every bone in his skull. I had literally talked to him about 5 minutes before it happened. Seeing someone that you've joke with and drank with... someone with so much personality, someone so good-looking, laying in ICU, his face an unrecognizeable, torn-up, mess... well, I sobbed and then told him he looked Sexy. They say he can hear us and I figure he's heard plenty of sobs and "Oh my gods" So I figured I'd say what I always say to him... "You know I still look better than you Larry." And he actually squeezed my hand... lightly, but It made me smile. He hasnt woken up in about 5 days, but he's not in a coma and not paralyzed... hooray. Oh and his beautiful smile? You'd figure after every other bone shattered, that his teeth would be gone? Nope, not a single tooth even chipped. Lucky boy. I would consider that a miracle that he'll be able to walk and talk and see (maybe with only one eye, but hey) and hear (with maybe only one ear).

Moral of the story... Please wear your seatbelt guys... I know I sound like a mommy, but seeing someone that used to be able to fire a retort at every sarcastic comment I ever made, laying in a bed, unable to even smile... knowing that its going to take at least a year for him to even begin to feed himself or walk... well, its just not worth it.

thoughts bubble

2007-07-09T21:52:27Z

I've been having such intricate dreams lately, as if my mind has gone hay-wire; this montage of images, sounds, colors and people; people that I haven't felt in ages but still linger under my skin. What is so strange though, about these vivid dreams, is how I feel in the morning. I always feel like I've been working out for 6 hours instead of resting; my heart is pounding, feet sore, whole body aching, and a strange head-ache. Not just that, but I wake up confused, like something is not right and i feel like the line between my dreams and reality has blurred slightly. And finally, what I find to be most strange is the similarity between my dreams and Cody's. It sounds crazy, but I wake up and tell cody about my dream and he swears that the same people and events have just occurred in his. Hmmmm.
Well, I found that odd.

Few other updates... I gave away my cat so the apartment feels empty when I am all alone. You know for a tiny apartment, its so easy to feel completely alone on the couch in the dark... at least without little paws playing with my hair and fingers and little meows and Juicy j pouncing on my feet when I walk by. I'm very sad without him.

Oh and work... I guess I just cannot wait until I am inspired enough to get all of these dreams on canvas so that I can sell my dreams to people who feel like they understand them. who knows though.

Sometimes I miss floating around. I want to get back on the road most days, but every once in a while its good to go home and fall asleep, knowing that the people you love are close by.

I think that that's about all of the random thoughts that have just gone through my head for now.

Miss you all. Muah.

hateface_blah @ 2007-04-13T11:03:00

2007-04-13T18:32:43Z

My life has turned into two hour nights of sleep, work and a habit I just cant shake because of the feeling it replaces in my heart when things get tooo hard to handle and this little life that I have created seems small and fragile.... me steadily becoming more and more aware of the surrounding elements that are so willing to shatter this glass box I've built to reflect my love at all angles. I feel these constant blows to the heart by people I'd felt that I had grown to love and perhaps far too easily trusted with my own darkest thoughts. I feel as though these people I've welcomed into my home have taken advantage of my hospitality and I find that they are the ones wreaking havock on this beautiful love and rare friendship that I have developed with the one man on this planet that is genuine down to the core. Its as if this misery that has encompased new tampa in the past year has got its fingers locked deep into the hearts of everyone around me, possessing them to destroy. All I want is the happiness and quiet that used to follow me. All I hear now is noise from the slaves who thrive off of chaos and hurt. Why must there always be an opinion about MY relationship? I just miss the peace and quiet. maybe I just need to get back on that daily green ya'll.

hateface_blah @ 2007-03-10T21:19:00

2007-03-11T02:21:20Z

Today is my last night in Tenn.
I cant say much, but downtown was fantastic
and
I got some pretty great photos that I will post soon.
I also watched Killa Season, drank Sizzurp and saw a huge waterfall
AND
got pretty sick from all of the things in bloom around here.
pretty sweet *grrrr

hateface_blah @ 2007-03-08T20:56:00

2007-03-09T01:56:28Z

So I ended up in Tennessee. Its pretty sweet.
yep.

peace

hateface_blah @ 2007-03-05T19:41:00

2007-03-06T03:50:10Z

Cody and I have a week off so we've decided to ride down to Key West and bum around. I'm excited! It's been so long since I've been home and the thought of relaxing out on the water all dau and getting wrecked downtown is fantastic. :) Not only that, but I'll be with cody. Our first real vacation and it couldnt be any better!

hateface_blah @ 2007-03-01T01:20:00

2007-03-01T06:27:05Z

Lately time seems to be flying by.
Cody and I are going to Key West for a few days and I'm so excited...
I miss the damn place so much.
Its so wonderful to have someone to fall asleep with every night.
To wake up with them and to find something else that you love
every single day.
I love my baby.
Or life together is beautiful. The safety and the comfort... the depth of our commitment.
I could never ask for more than this.
Oh and we finally have a home phone!
I feel so stupid but I was grinning from ear to ear when I heard the phone ring and our answering machine pick up.
What a loser I am.
hah

hateface_blah @ 2006-12-06T18:28:00

2006-12-06T22:28:20Z

peaches was fantastic. even if bia and I had to leave like an hour early :\ it was well worth it though. Working everyday is wearing me thin. It seems like I never have time to sleep. what can you do?
Ummm oh yeah...Green.

I hope I have enough money to get everyone what I want to get them. blarrrgh... damn electric bills and shit. Fuck it Im buying candles and everyone's pissin outside :P

Life is what I've made it. basically... and its pretty damn good.

hateface_blah @ 2006-12-01T18:19:00

2006-12-01T22:19:56Z

last night was amazing. AK. and flat chested fucks. ahhahaha and roof top pics while blazed. couldnt get much better!
em,bia,dave and cody jones. love you guys.
LANGERADO ROAD TRIP BALLLINN'

oh yeah and my cat is a gangster.

hateface_blah @ 2006-10-26T09:50:00

2006-10-26T13:52:33Z

“What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction.”

every day is blurred into one long finger smudge of charcoal against white paper. monotonous, prosaic, recurrent, uninteresting, unvaried. that is this life.

hateface_blah @ 2006-10-17T00:51:00

2006-10-17T04:51:46Z

hateface_blah @ 2006-10-05T23:49:00

2006-10-06T03:58:19Z

I'm enjoying this life. even though I have to say It could be a little more interesting.

Im in love with this wedding dress.
:)